Plans are just dreams until they are executed.
Sometimes you really need to bite your tongue until it bleeds down the back of your throat.
No, I don’t care. I am just good at acting like I do.
Avoid boats rowed by your enemies.
Don’t marry a man (or a woman) in love with someone else.
Don’t let others ambitions destroy you.
Your doctor can’t heal life’s disappointments.
The first termite is as much to blame as the last termite.
Enjoy life. You only get the one.
I don’t criticize your lifestyle, don’t criticize mine.
Why be calm when you can be a drama queen?
A nine-to-five job is not the only form of success.
It ISN’T easy….
Though a picture tells a story, it may not reveal the whole truth.
Did we forget the pets at the baggage claim?
You should not count your chickens when they are in the foxes mouth.
Behind every great woman is a man checking out her ass.
Actually, I am that kind of girl, just not with you.
Trouble doesn’t require an invitation.
The best candidate doesn’t always get the job.
Children are a blessing – you never know when you’ll need blood or a spare kidney.
There is only one thing more annoying to a woman than a man who doesn’t understand her – a man who does.
Wouldn’t it be easier just to humor me?
Whoever said less is more probably never had quite enough more.
If you have a pussy, or like pussy, you should be a feminist.
Stop me before I say yes again.
Screwing up is part of improving.
I love being stupid together.
You shouldn’t always do what the voices in your head tell you to do.
True, you didn’t promise me a rose garden, but I am hoping all your shit will at least be good fertilizer.
Try to stay centered so you don’t lose your mind.