Sex with you may be an earthshaking experience, but so is a devastating earthquake. It doesn’t mean it was good…
A fertilized egg should not have more value than a woman.
If we could talk like the animals, we would all be sniffing each others butts a lot.
Don’t just make excuses, make really great excuses.
Happy shouldn’t just be for one hour.
Team work is great, as long as I am in charge.
Time peels all scabs.
Fools make others appear wise in comparison.
In art, as in life, there are no mistakes, only unplanned elements.
Just because it fits in your mouth does not mean it belongs there.
Before you walk the line, you have to know where it is.
If you think people are looking at you funny, maybe it is because you aren’t wearing any pants.
When you have no challenge, achievement is limited.
It is easy to lie. It is difficult to lie consistently.
It’s my birthday and I’ll cry if I want to.
It is better to have a flaccid hat than a flaccid penis.
Don’t make me have to pretend to like you.
Don’t tear others down when you can raise them up.
Fuck the red wine or white wine with the meal dilemma. Vodka goes with everything.
Sometimes it is better just to admit it’s lust instead of pretending it’s love.
It is okay to have your own opinion, but sometimes, it is better to keep it to yourself.
You can agree with me or you can be wrong.
You only live once, you may as well enjoy it.
Atrophy comes to those who wait.
Growing up is over-rated.
Don’t just respect age when it comes in a bottle.
If you are going to steal, at least steal something worth having.
It is difficult to spread truth when the world wants to be deceived.
When the wind blows hard enough, even dead turkeys can fly.
If you don’t want the monkey on your back, stop feeding it.
If a black cat crosses your path, pet it.